Why did Balasaheb Deo feel he couldn't read the Dnyaneshwari, and what was his state of mind about it?

Balasaheb Deo's struggle with the Dnyaneshwari was a source of significant distress for him, as explained in Chapter 41. Although he had a strong desire to read it daily, some obstacle would invariably prevent him, and his resolution would not hold. This was in contrast to other books, which he could read regularly. When he did manage to take the Dnyaneshwari in hand, doubts would arise in his heart, causing the reading to remain superficial and preventing him from feeling any love for the text. He was so distressed by this failure that even a resolution to read just five verses daily did not succeed. This led him to a state of surrender, resolving to wait for a direct command from Sai Baba himself.