Can you elaborate on the paradox of Balasaheb Deo's spiritual practice and the ultimate solution he resolved to follow?

The paradox in Balasaheb Deo's practice, described in Chapter 41, was that despite a strong desire to read the Dnyaneshwari daily, he consistently failed, whereas reading other books presented no such challenge. This specific obstacle made his reading feel superficial and devoid of love. After much distress and failed attempts, he concluded that his personal effort was insufficient. The ultimate solution he resolved to follow was one of complete surrender. He made a firm vow to not even attempt to read the Dnyaneshwari until Sai Baba Himself provided both the explicit order to read and the inner love required to truly connect with the text.